He's reluctant to pull away from the kiss, but doesn't protest when Barnaby comes up for air. Kotetsu's gaze hovers somewhere around the line of Barnaby's collarbone, prominent and clear even under the shirt he wears. He keeps his gaze lowered, not because he regrets the moment, but because there's an inevitable twist of guilt that settles in his stomach. One he knew he would encounter, were a moment like this one to ever arise.
The shine of his wedding ring becomes clear as Kotetsu draws his hand forward from the nape of Barnaby's neck, trailing slowly down to the center of his chest. The longer he gets to feel Barnaby's skin warm under his palm, the more real the moment becomes. Little details etching their way in through the heavy pulse of his heart.
"I was married. To a woman I had the honor of spending an entire life with," agrees Kotetsu, raising his hand again, until he can run a rough, calloused thumb over the line of Barnaby's jaw. "To a woman I thought I would spend my whole life with."
He's not sure how to explain the way the colors faded in the years following her passing.
"I haven't stopped loving her. Never will. But I can be honest when I know I've found someone else I want to spend this life with." His hand shakes traitorously. "And forcing myself to be alone does nothing to honor her, or the happiness she taught me to cherish."
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timeasmymeasure
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Date: 2014-05-10 06:37 pm (UTC)The shine of his wedding ring becomes clear as Kotetsu draws his hand forward from the nape of Barnaby's neck, trailing slowly down to the center of his chest. The longer he gets to feel Barnaby's skin warm under his palm, the more real the moment becomes. Little details etching their way in through the heavy pulse of his heart.
"I was married. To a woman I had the honor of spending an entire life with," agrees Kotetsu, raising his hand again, until he can run a rough, calloused thumb over the line of Barnaby's jaw. "To a woman I thought I would spend my whole life with."
He's not sure how to explain the way the colors faded in the years following her passing.
"I haven't stopped loving her. Never will. But I can be honest when I know I've found someone else I want to spend this life with." His hand shakes traitorously. "And forcing myself to be alone does nothing to honor her, or the happiness she taught me to cherish."